I say to you, though he will not rise and give to him because he is his friend, yet because of his persistence he will rise and give him as many as he needs. “So I say to you, ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives, and he who seeks finds, and to him who knocks it will be opened..." (Luke 11:8-10)
So, I sort of had one of those "aha" moments tonight while praying and reading. I know this verse; many of us know this passage and how Jesus, in the original language, is saying to "keep on asking" "keep on seeking" and "keep on knocking". Of course our Glorious and Gracious God and Father knows our needs before we even know them ourselves. Of course He has promised to "add all these other things unto us" as we seek first His kingdom and His righteousness (Matt 6) and of course He will clothe us like the lilies of the field and He will feed us like the birds of the air, but we have to ask...and not just ask, but keep on asking almost as if we are being - annoying?
I went in search of this verse tonight. I just wanted to read it in context and I am so glad I did, and so glad that I started in verse 1 so that I experienced verse 8. The man who came to his neighbor in the middle of the night for bread did not receive the bread because he was such a good friend of the man to whom he came, but because of his persistence. Dictionary.com says "persistent" is:
1. insisting, in spite of opposition, obstacles, discouragement, etc.;
2. lasting or enduring tenaciously
3. constantly repeated
So now, to my "aha" moment. My relationship with God is directly related to how I parent. Can I just tell you? I HATE when my children ask me for the same thing more than once - even if I know I am going to give it to them, it is good for them, I plan on doing it - "just ask me once and wait patiently for me to do it!!!" This is how I am with God. I ask once! And I wait. Perhaps I was told "no" a lot as a child and just learned to accept it. If God doesn't "answer" immediately, I take it as a "no" or a "not now" and I move on to something else.
What am I missing out on by not persistently asking my Father, who longs to give good gifts to me, His child, over and over and over again, according to His will, the things I need, want and long for? And, as a parent, what can I teach my children about perseverance and persistence in life by shutting them up so quickly and commandingly? Can I be teaching them about imploring God for their own desires, surrendered to His will, that they have by instead telling them to "ask me again later, now isn't the right time?", or something similar to that? I think I should try this.
Now, granted, there are times when the answer is "no" and children need to accept that graciously and move on, or the answer may be "yes, but wait", or "not now" and obedience should be practiced as well, but I am taking ti as a personal challenge to answer at least one of my children's requests tomorrow with, "that sounds like a great idea, but can you remind me in a couple minutes?" and see what that does for all of us.
Just a thought about God, our Father, and mothering...
Saturday, July 3, 2010
Thursday, June 3, 2010
I'm Busy!
"Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest" Matthew 11:28
Tonight, after dinner and baths and evening "straightening up", while sitting on the couch, nursing Cadel to sleep, I realized, I am busy! Between homeschool (determined to have Naomi reading fluently by Fall), curriculum and homeschool-method research, birthday planning (Beckham is turning 3 on Saturday), housekeeping (wouldn't it be nice to be able to take a day off from this, but not have it accumulate only to have twice as much to do the following day), shopping, planning, fellowshipping, playing with my wonderful family, and oh yeah, breathing - life just seems a little hectic these days and tonight I realized it.
Tonight, when I sat down, after the kids were asleep, to do my evening devotions, I realized that even my time in God's word, is busy! Reading systematically through God's word is amazing, and having the whole counsel of God in my heart and at my disposal is priceless, but sometimes a psalm and proverb in the morning and 3 pre-arranged chapters every evening become like everything else, a duty! Tonight, I needed intimacy with my Sweet Savior.
I sat on the couch and hugged my bible like a little girl hugging her favorite teddy bear (and to continue with this analogy, my bible is the equivalent of the raggedy old teddy bear that is missing an eye and whose nose stitches are all but gone - ha!). I genuinely wanted to "snuggle" with my Lord, feel Him wrap me up in His arms and say, "Rest. Find peace and solace in Me." Those three chapters of Joshua I missed tonight will still be there tomorrow night, and God will speak to me in them just like He has spoken to me from Genesis and Revelation and every book in between, but tonight I turned to a favorite place, a place filled with underlines, notes and encouragement - Philippians!
Oh what Joy we have in Christ! What encouragement that He who began a good work in us will complete it! What encouragement to be reminded to do things in love, with likemindedness and with a spirit of humility, preferring others before ourselves. To press towards the goal, the prize, not that we have already attained it, but laying a hold of it, because Christ has laid a hold of us. Our citizenship is in heaven - Amen! And "finally, brethren, whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy—meditate on these things" (Philippians 4:8).
My Jesus met me right there on the couch and wrapped me up in His loving arms and encouraged me. He reminded me of what I already knew and comforted my weary mind. My heart is not weary - Praise the Lord. Serving Him through serving my family is my joy and my calling. I am so grateful to be where I am, and doing what I am doing, but in the hustle and bustle of "life", I forgot about where to put my mind - on the true, noble, just, pure and lovely things that surround my life!
Blessed Savior, Thou hast promised Thou wilt all our burdens bear
Tonight, after dinner and baths and evening "straightening up", while sitting on the couch, nursing Cadel to sleep, I realized, I am busy! Between homeschool (determined to have Naomi reading fluently by Fall), curriculum and homeschool-method research, birthday planning (Beckham is turning 3 on Saturday), housekeeping (wouldn't it be nice to be able to take a day off from this, but not have it accumulate only to have twice as much to do the following day), shopping, planning, fellowshipping, playing with my wonderful family, and oh yeah, breathing - life just seems a little hectic these days and tonight I realized it.
Tonight, when I sat down, after the kids were asleep, to do my evening devotions, I realized that even my time in God's word, is busy! Reading systematically through God's word is amazing, and having the whole counsel of God in my heart and at my disposal is priceless, but sometimes a psalm and proverb in the morning and 3 pre-arranged chapters every evening become like everything else, a duty! Tonight, I needed intimacy with my Sweet Savior.
I sat on the couch and hugged my bible like a little girl hugging her favorite teddy bear (and to continue with this analogy, my bible is the equivalent of the raggedy old teddy bear that is missing an eye and whose nose stitches are all but gone - ha!). I genuinely wanted to "snuggle" with my Lord, feel Him wrap me up in His arms and say, "Rest. Find peace and solace in Me." Those three chapters of Joshua I missed tonight will still be there tomorrow night, and God will speak to me in them just like He has spoken to me from Genesis and Revelation and every book in between, but tonight I turned to a favorite place, a place filled with underlines, notes and encouragement - Philippians!
Oh what Joy we have in Christ! What encouragement that He who began a good work in us will complete it! What encouragement to be reminded to do things in love, with likemindedness and with a spirit of humility, preferring others before ourselves. To press towards the goal, the prize, not that we have already attained it, but laying a hold of it, because Christ has laid a hold of us. Our citizenship is in heaven - Amen! And "finally, brethren, whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy—meditate on these things" (Philippians 4:8).
My Jesus met me right there on the couch and wrapped me up in His loving arms and encouraged me. He reminded me of what I already knew and comforted my weary mind. My heart is not weary - Praise the Lord. Serving Him through serving my family is my joy and my calling. I am so grateful to be where I am, and doing what I am doing, but in the hustle and bustle of "life", I forgot about where to put my mind - on the true, noble, just, pure and lovely things that surround my life!
What a Friend we have in Jesus, all our sins and griefs to bear!
What a privilege to carry everything to God in prayer!
O what peace we often forfeit, O what needless pain we bear,
All because we do not carry everything to God in prayer.
Have we trials and temptations? Is there trouble anywhere?
We should never be discouraged; take it to the Lord in prayer.
Can we find a friend so faithful who will all our sorrows share?
Jesus knows our every weakness; take it to the Lord in prayer.
Are we weak and heavy laden, cumbered with a load of care?
Precious Savior, still our refuge, take it to the Lord in prayer.
Do your friends despise, forsake you? Take it to the Lord in prayer!
In His arms He’ll take and shield you; you will find a solace there.
Blessed Savior, Thou hast promised Thou wilt all our burdens bear
May we ever, Lord, be bringing all to Thee in earnest prayer.
Soon in glory bright unclouded there will be no need for prayer
Rapture, praise and endless worship will be our sweet portion there
Thursday, May 20, 2010
Starting from Scratch - A Series?
Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new. (2 Corinthians 5:17)
I had a thought the other day about blogs and how almost every (if not every) blog you read is about the things we all do right! I haven't seen very many blogs about the cookies we burnt, the icing that melted, the party that was a flop or the homeschooling mom who got burnt out and sent her kids back to public school. Oh no! Blogging is for our victories that we want to share with others to give them insight and inspiration that may spur them on to great things in their own journeys towards greatness, and I LOVE that these blogs exist. I have gleaned so much from the amazing women whose blogs I have chosen to "follow". From recipes to party planning, and homeschooling to housekeeping: blogging women have come into my home and head and have inspired and launched many of the disciplines and creativity's that are a part of our home today. But I thought I would do something different!
I named this post (perhaps a series if I get inspired) "Starting from Scratch" because that is what I am. I am a first generation Christian, Homeschooling and Stay At Home Mom who happens to be in a very happy and successful marriage. I was raised by my agnostic (at best), atheist (at worst), choleric and very type-A father. I am the oldest of two (I have a brother) and we didn't have a "great" childhood - but neither one of us ever really complained. I came to the Lord in my teens (Senior Year of High School) at a Greg Laurie Church service around Thanksgiving in 1995. It didn't take much for me to realize that things needed to change in my life - immediately - and I didn't seem to have too much trouble allowing the Holy Spirit access into my life to make those changes.
It just seemed natural that I should change my plans for studying abroad at the American University of Paris after graduating high school to go to Calvary Chapel Bible College in Murietta, CA. I needed to put some knowledge behind this "faith" that I had newly acquired. I am certain God gave me the gift of faith upon salvation, although I didn't know it at the time, but because of my need for head knowledge and understanding, I needed to not have "stupid faith". I needed confidence and cohesiveness in my new way of life! And off I went to study the bible - what a culture shock!!!
My first day on campus, I cussed! Loudly! The "F" word! Starting from scratch, right!!! Hey, the only book in the Bible I had read at this point was the Gospel of John (isn't that where we all start?) and a little bit of Genesis and Psalms. I didn't know that it says,"Let no corrupt communication proceed from your mouth..." in Ephesians. Oh, but boy did I know that it was not okay to do that again after seeing the looks of the faces of those five people sitting around the pool with me that day.
No one taught me about devotions (or what this "Christianese" word even meant), or praying before meals (and why?) or so many other things that those who are raised in Christian homes take for granted (don't get me wrong...I find "no fault" in those who were raised in Christian homes and pray to God every day that my children too will be raised in such a way that they "take for granted" these disciplines of a faith-filled life). But, by the power of the Holy Spirit, I learned them, all from scratch. I learned the relevance and necessity of spending time with Jesus in the morning before my day began, and spending time with him the evening before I went to sleep (read Psalm 55:17). I learned that praying before my meals was not because the food I was eating may have been sacrificed to idols, or because it was "unholy", but because it was just another opportunity for me to recognize Jesus Christ and what He did for me - the sacrifice that He made for me on the cross to forgive my sins, and just to thank Him - for anything and everything. I learned that out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks and if I put in "good", those "bad words" won't come out anymore! I learned that I was indeed, a new creation in Christ!
And now, fifteen years later, here I am. A first generation Christian mother of four amazing children, who was never led by a parent in prayer or family devotions - yet endeavoring to do that with my children. A mother, not raised by a mother but by a father (she is in my life now, and I love her dearly, but she was not around at pivotal times in my childhood), who was not taught how to make a bed (my husband taught me after we were married!!!) or how to clean a house properly (I am getting better - and actually have a "cleaning date" planned with my grandmother who is going to "teach me" how to thoroughly and deeply clean an entire home - I can't wait), but eager each day to create an environment of loveliness in my home by being dilligent, not eating the bread of idleness and tending to the ways of my household (Proverbs 31). I am a public-school taught, self-motivated and natural learner who is stepping out in faith to bring my children home and teach them a Classical Education with a Christian worldview, completely unsure how to do it, where to start, what to buy and not to buy and whether or not it will "work" in our house.
I am making mistakes. I am uncertain and definitely not an expert. But, I have victories in Christ. He is my strength. He is my joy and He is the lifter of my head. I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me and walking in the center of His will for my life makes these impossibilities (homeschool? Four children? My step-daughter? With a preschooler, toddler and a baby? really Lord?), possible and even exciting. I feel empowered and think I will document my mistakes and my victories and perhaps someday someone else who has never been led in family devotions, but feels called by the Lord to raise her children in the way they should go, might feel encouraged by my mistakes and failures (oh, we've had plenty of setbacks, but that will be another post) and carry on! Perhaps!
Tuesday, May 18, 2010
Freezer Cooking - Revised
As my freezer slowly regained the space it once had before I loaded it down with over 30 meals in various shapes, sizes and flavors, I started to realize that the opportunity I was provided to spend an entire day cooking was most likely NOT going to present itself again, but I really enjoyed the freedom Once a Month Cooking (OAMC) gave to me as well as the money it saved at the grocery store (being able to buy in bulk when items were on sale instead of buying what I needed, when I needed it, at whatever price it happened to be). So, I decided to do a revised version of freezer cooking:
I was still able to buy all of my meat on sale (no cut above $2.00/lb) and all at once. I bought a good variety of different cuts of beef, some chicken legs, thighs and breasts, as well as some pork (I didn't buy pork last time because it isn't our "favorite", but it was only $.97/lb - how could I pass that up?). This time, however, I came home and put it all in the freezer, instead of the refrigerator, and decided to take it slowly. I made my menu for the month and took the how-do-you-eat-an-elephant-?-one-bite-at-a-time approach:
Saturday - Slow Cooker Roast (3 1/2 lb)
I was still able to buy all of my meat on sale (no cut above $2.00/lb) and all at once. I bought a good variety of different cuts of beef, some chicken legs, thighs and breasts, as well as some pork (I didn't buy pork last time because it isn't our "favorite", but it was only $.97/lb - how could I pass that up?). This time, however, I came home and put it all in the freezer, instead of the refrigerator, and decided to take it slowly. I made my menu for the month and took the how-do-you-eat-an-elephant-?-one-bite-at-a-time approach:
Saturday - Slow Cooker Roast (3 1/2 lb)
- 1 1/2 lb - Saturday Evening with Roasted Veggies
- 1 lb - Monday Tacos with Rice and Beans
- 1 lb - Into Freezer for a meal later in the month
Sunday - Salad and Fryer Chicken (no left-overs)
Monday - BBQ Beef and Shrimp Kabobs with Rice (no left-overs)
Tuesday - Chicken Drumsticks (5lb)
- 2 lb - Chicken Soup (2 servings - one for tonight and one for the freezer for later in the month)
- 3 lb - in slow cooker to be shredded and used in 3 different chicken meals for later in the month
- Bones, Broth and Left-Overs will be used to make Chicken Stock tomorrow for the rest of the month's cooking
Wednesday - Pork Loin (5 1/2 lb) - cooked in slow cooker
- Wednesday Night - BBQ Pork with Baked Potato and salad (1 1/2 lb)
- The remaining 4 lb will be used in 2-3 other meals for later in the month (haven't found anything yet, but at least one of them will be BBQ Pork Sandwiches)
Thursday - Chicken Breasts (5 lb) - Broiled
- Thursday - Chicken Cordon Bleu with mashed potatoes and veggies
- The rest of the chicken will be cubed and made into three different dishes for the freezer- chicken pot pie, Chinese Chicken Chow Mein, Chicken Taco Salad
Friday - Ground Beef (4lb) - used in various ways
- Friday - Mexican Lasagna (Brown 2 lb together, use one for Lasagna and one freeze for tacos later in the week)
- 1 lb make meat balls for Albondigas Soup (Mexican Meatball Soup - so good)
- 1 lb make Meat Loaf (we never finish a meatloaf made with 2lb so one if fine and we just use a smaller pan) for later in the week
Saturday is left-over day and Sunday we'll start pulling stuff out of the freezer. After this week's cooking and freezing, I will still have about 10 lb of meat in the freezer waiting to be used, but I will also have about 14 meals already prepared and waiting to be served. I will alternate between freezer meals and "from scratch" meals throughout the remaining weeks until all of my meat is gone and then start the process all over again. I think this might be a good adjustment to OAMC for me!
Monday, April 12, 2010
I did it!!!
This is an "aside"...no verse directly related to this, but I had to post it.
Today I cooked over 30 meals (dinners and some lunches for the next month) and I am so excited!!!
I have been doing some reading about Once A Month Cooking (OAMC) and thought it would be fun to try, but with our income the way that it is, I didn't think we'd ever be able to have enough money to buy all the stuff we needed for the whole month in one shopping. Well, we got a gift card in the mail on Friday for $150 from Verizon (for signing up with FIOS) - free money basically. I decided this might be the chance we needed to "get ahead" and went to the grocery store on the hunt for good deals on meat.
This is what I came home with:
8 pounds of Lean Ground Beef
10 pounds Round Steak
3 1/2 pounds Rib Eye Roast
3.7 pounds Flank Steak
4 pounds chicken drumsticks
4 pounds chicken breasts
2 pounds shrimp
After a couple more grocery stores (Sprout and Trader Joe's for produce) and 13 hours in the kitchen, it turned into over thirty meals, inlcuding:
Hamburger Patties
Taco Meat
Meat Loaf
Albondigas
Shepherd's Pie
Chicken Soup
Shrimp Soup
BBQ Chicken Pasta
Chicken Pot Pie
Crunchy Chicken Sticks
Fajitas
Stir Fry
Swiss Steak
Beef Stroganoff
Broccoli Chicken Casserole
And oh so much more...
So, for less than $110 (which, really, net it was $0 because I used the gift card from Verizon) and a REALLY long day in the kitchen, I have my entire menu planed until the middle of May and all I have to do it remember to take the "dinner" out of the freezer the night before, heat it up with some side dishes (some of which are also already in my freezer -- thank you!) and dinner is served!
So much fun! You should try it :-)
Thursday, April 8, 2010
Bigger is not always Better
"She is like the merchant ships, bringing her food from afar" (Proverbs 31:14 NIV)
As the manager and keeper of my home, and without a real income to assist in the expenses of our home, I see it as my job to cut costs as a way of contributing to the bottom line of our family. I have already cut our "food" budget from over $1200/month (for a family of 6 - including non-grocery items like cleaning supplies, baby supplies and personal care items) down to less than $600/month, but I am determined to do more. So, in an effort to be like our lady of example, bringing my food from afar consists of checking the weekly ads from various grocery stores, determining what to buy where and distinguishing the advatages and disadvantages of going to multiple or a single store in any given week (depending on how great the sale and our needs for that week).
For weeks I have been debating on whether or not to invest in a membership to Costco. I fear that if I buy in bulk (snacks especially) that we will eat in bulk! But, I know that if there is a huge difference in cost for things like meat, I can freeze, or prepare meals ahead of time (thus adding to our savings my insuring that we will not eat out because I will always be prepared with meals in the freezer!!!). Since Costco doesn't send out those handy little weekly ads that let you know what is on sale, I had to make one myself. Armed with a pad of paper and a pen, I walked in Costco like I had a membership (pretending to be on the phone and distracted) and I began my investigation. Here is what I found:
When Bigger is Better:
Snacks - prices on snacks are fairly impressive at Costco. I know everyone buys different things for her family, but here are a couple examples of how much cheper some of the items we buy are at Costco
As the manager and keeper of my home, and without a real income to assist in the expenses of our home, I see it as my job to cut costs as a way of contributing to the bottom line of our family. I have already cut our "food" budget from over $1200/month (for a family of 6 - including non-grocery items like cleaning supplies, baby supplies and personal care items) down to less than $600/month, but I am determined to do more. So, in an effort to be like our lady of example, bringing my food from afar consists of checking the weekly ads from various grocery stores, determining what to buy where and distinguishing the advatages and disadvantages of going to multiple or a single store in any given week (depending on how great the sale and our needs for that week).
For weeks I have been debating on whether or not to invest in a membership to Costco. I fear that if I buy in bulk (snacks especially) that we will eat in bulk! But, I know that if there is a huge difference in cost for things like meat, I can freeze, or prepare meals ahead of time (thus adding to our savings my insuring that we will not eat out because I will always be prepared with meals in the freezer!!!). Since Costco doesn't send out those handy little weekly ads that let you know what is on sale, I had to make one myself. Armed with a pad of paper and a pen, I walked in Costco like I had a membership (pretending to be on the phone and distracted) and I began my investigation. Here is what I found:
When Bigger is Better:
Snacks - prices on snacks are fairly impressive at Costco. I know everyone buys different things for her family, but here are a couple examples of how much cheper some of the items we buy are at Costco
- Nutella - about $3.00/jar savings
- Gummies - about $6.00 savings over 2 month supply
- Pistacios - $1.75/lb savings
- Sun Chips - $.45/individual bag savings
- Microwave Popcorn - $.63/bag savings
- Go-gurt - $2.50/package savings
- Pretzels - $1.60/package savings
Cleaning Supplies - I won't bore you with details, but if I bought all of my cleaning supplies at Costco v. my regular store, I would save about $10.00.
When Bigger is NOT Better - Meat and Produce! I was so bummed. This is the reason I went there. I was so ready to get a membership and come home with pounds and pounds of meat to have a day preparing meals for the next month and NADA! Just by way of example on a couple items:
- London Broil Beef was $1.00/lb more at Costco than the advertised price in the Stater Brothers Circular Ad
- Stew Meat was over $1.50 more at Costco than the Albertson's Ad
- Chuck Roast was $1.75 more than the Vons' Ad
- Whole Fryer Chickens weren't expensive ($.99/lb), but this week they are on sale for $.67/lb at Stater Brothers
- Chicken Breats were $1.80/lb more at Costco than the non-sale price at my regular grocery
The other items I buy frequently were very similar in price (but of course in larger quantities: Pro-less frequent shopping; Con-higher grocery bill at least one week out of the month). So, my fact finding mission led me to this conclusion - if someone wants to buy me a membership to Costco for my birthday, I will accept it :-), but for me to make up the cost of the membership in savings, it will take me months (and if I factor in the drive and the time spent doing it, I might as well stick to store hopping right here in my own neighborhood, checking the reduced to sell quickly bins for meat and seafood and buying our extra-special snack-treats when they are on sale and appreciate them all the more), and I am not sure that is worth it!
How are you contributing to the bottom line in your home? I'd love to hear!
Sunday, March 28, 2010
What about bad days?
"She looks well to the ways of her household, And does not eat the bread of idleness." Proverbs 31:27 (NASB)
God really is amazing, and has such an incredible sense of humor. You know, while I was in the shower this morning, this exact thought went through my mind, "What about bad days? Did the Proverbs 31 Woman ever have a bad day?" Did they forget verse 32 where she laid down and took a nap, or asked her husband to watch the kids so she could go to Starbucks for a break? Did she ever just not feel like (fill in the blank) and not do it?"
As I looked back at the past two weeks I see days that I neglected my schedule (the kids were sick, I was sick, we had appointments, blah, blah, blah), days that I wanted to nap more than I can remember wanting to nap than when my babies were only weeks old; days when my chores were not completed the way they should have been and moments when I did not encourage my children to complete their chores or daily disciplines the way that they should. And then, this morning at church a word of Prophesy is spoken over me where which I am told, "Concentrate - you have many decisions to make in the coming months and years. God will use others and His word to show you what to do, but you must be self-disciplined"
What other word can best describe the Proverbs 31 woman than self-disciplined?
So, if the Proverbs 31 woman really did exist, then we can be certain that she wasn't perfect, and perhaps she did have "one of those days" every now and then! But the important thing here is that those days did not mark her character. Her nobility, her strength and dignity and her diligence are what she is remembered for. Because she did not "eat the bread of idleness" on a regular basis, on those days when she needed a break, she was allotted it with ease and pleasure (I speak out of assumption, not based on biblical teaching) by those around her who knew her hard work and desired to reward her with rest. She is a woman of composure, patience and self-possession who was productive, dependable and influential. By seeking to live a life marked with self-discipline, we all can be known as women with a genuine sense of calling and purpose for our lives, and with self-discipline governing the practical and spiritual areas of our lives, verses 10 through 29 of Proverbs 31 will be second nature to us and no longer an impossible mountain to climb. Then we too, along with this woman will, be given the product of our hands, and our works will praise us in the gates (v.31)
God really is amazing, and has such an incredible sense of humor. You know, while I was in the shower this morning, this exact thought went through my mind, "What about bad days? Did the Proverbs 31 Woman ever have a bad day?" Did they forget verse 32 where she laid down and took a nap, or asked her husband to watch the kids so she could go to Starbucks for a break? Did she ever just not feel like (fill in the blank) and not do it?"
As I looked back at the past two weeks I see days that I neglected my schedule (the kids were sick, I was sick, we had appointments, blah, blah, blah), days that I wanted to nap more than I can remember wanting to nap than when my babies were only weeks old; days when my chores were not completed the way they should have been and moments when I did not encourage my children to complete their chores or daily disciplines the way that they should. And then, this morning at church a word of Prophesy is spoken over me where which I am told, "Concentrate - you have many decisions to make in the coming months and years. God will use others and His word to show you what to do, but you must be self-disciplined"
What other word can best describe the Proverbs 31 woman than self-disciplined?
- She gets the job done no matter what it takes (v.11)
- She works hard enough to even make a profit (vv. 11-15)
- She delays her own gratification and pleasure to invest her profits and then tirelessly works those investments for further gain (vv. 16-19)
- She generously participates in the larger community by giving to the poor (v. 20)
- She has no fear of the future (vv. 21-27)
- She is honored, respected, admired, praised and rewarded (vv. 28-31)
So, if the Proverbs 31 woman really did exist, then we can be certain that she wasn't perfect, and perhaps she did have "one of those days" every now and then! But the important thing here is that those days did not mark her character. Her nobility, her strength and dignity and her diligence are what she is remembered for. Because she did not "eat the bread of idleness" on a regular basis, on those days when she needed a break, she was allotted it with ease and pleasure (I speak out of assumption, not based on biblical teaching) by those around her who knew her hard work and desired to reward her with rest. She is a woman of composure, patience and self-possession who was productive, dependable and influential. By seeking to live a life marked with self-discipline, we all can be known as women with a genuine sense of calling and purpose for our lives, and with self-discipline governing the practical and spiritual areas of our lives, verses 10 through 29 of Proverbs 31 will be second nature to us and no longer an impossible mountain to climb. Then we too, along with this woman will, be given the product of our hands, and our works will praise us in the gates (v.31)
Friday, March 12, 2010
The Next Generation
"She is not afraid of snow for her household, for all her household is clothed with scarlet" Proverbs 31:21 NKJV
There is a very commonly used adage around Christian circles that says, "there is only one interpretation of the bible, but there can be many applications". This verse, for me, falls into the "many applications" portion, and always has. Clearly, a family in Jerusalem would have to worry about very cold (and in this case, snowy) winters, and this mom and wife is not afraid for her family because she has provided for them the clothing necessary to make it through these frigid conditions comfortably. And not only are they clothed in wool (v.13), but she makes them beautiful by dying them Scarlet, or deep red. So, yes, the interpretation of this verse is literal - she takes care of their needs and cares about the quality and condition of her family's attire; however, the application for me, every time I have ever read this passage, even before I had children is about Jesus Christ.
I, rather, have read this verse as, "She doesn't fear in times of trouble because her family is covered by the blood of the Lamb". She has raised her children in the way that they should go. The law of God is written on their hearts and His statutes are their daily desire. What a great desire I have to say to my children some day, "Let no one despise your youth, but be an example to the believers in word, in conduct, in love, in spirit, in faith, in purity..." (1 Timothy 4:12). How great will it be to encourage and exhort our children to serve the Lord with boldness while they are young adults, because we took the time and care to ensure, while they were babes, that they were "covered in scarlet", the Scarlet of the Cross!
Oh mothers (and fathers), may we endeavor to encourage our children to be bold for Christ, at every age, and never let them be held back from doing what they believe God has called them to do or to be for His kingdom! Oh that our children would be a refreshing example to those who may have waxed cold over time. May our little ones stay firm in the Lord and grow up to confound those who might try to discredit them because of their age, because of their faith, purity and knowledge of spiritual and worldly things. May the Lord shine brighter and more pure in our children in order that more may come to know Him in the next generation than in any other before. Let us parents not grow weary in well-doing, but let us stay strong in the power of His might so that we may encourage and equip the next generation to be bold for Christ.
For now, at least for my household, it is still my responsibility to clothe them. My children are young and are not yet at that "age of accountability", but just as I wouldn't send them up to the mountains without shoes or jackets to fend off the winter weather alone and unprepared, neither will I send them into the world without the cloak of Christ guarding their little hearts and minds. There will come a day when they chose Whom they will serve and put Him on, with boldness and conviction, to serve Him with all their hearts, all their minds and all their strength!
There is a very commonly used adage around Christian circles that says, "there is only one interpretation of the bible, but there can be many applications". This verse, for me, falls into the "many applications" portion, and always has. Clearly, a family in Jerusalem would have to worry about very cold (and in this case, snowy) winters, and this mom and wife is not afraid for her family because she has provided for them the clothing necessary to make it through these frigid conditions comfortably. And not only are they clothed in wool (v.13), but she makes them beautiful by dying them Scarlet, or deep red. So, yes, the interpretation of this verse is literal - she takes care of their needs and cares about the quality and condition of her family's attire; however, the application for me, every time I have ever read this passage, even before I had children is about Jesus Christ.
I, rather, have read this verse as, "She doesn't fear in times of trouble because her family is covered by the blood of the Lamb". She has raised her children in the way that they should go. The law of God is written on their hearts and His statutes are their daily desire. What a great desire I have to say to my children some day, "Let no one despise your youth, but be an example to the believers in word, in conduct, in love, in spirit, in faith, in purity..." (1 Timothy 4:12). How great will it be to encourage and exhort our children to serve the Lord with boldness while they are young adults, because we took the time and care to ensure, while they were babes, that they were "covered in scarlet", the Scarlet of the Cross!
Oh mothers (and fathers), may we endeavor to encourage our children to be bold for Christ, at every age, and never let them be held back from doing what they believe God has called them to do or to be for His kingdom! Oh that our children would be a refreshing example to those who may have waxed cold over time. May our little ones stay firm in the Lord and grow up to confound those who might try to discredit them because of their age, because of their faith, purity and knowledge of spiritual and worldly things. May the Lord shine brighter and more pure in our children in order that more may come to know Him in the next generation than in any other before. Let us parents not grow weary in well-doing, but let us stay strong in the power of His might so that we may encourage and equip the next generation to be bold for Christ.
For now, at least for my household, it is still my responsibility to clothe them. My children are young and are not yet at that "age of accountability", but just as I wouldn't send them up to the mountains without shoes or jackets to fend off the winter weather alone and unprepared, neither will I send them into the world without the cloak of Christ guarding their little hearts and minds. There will come a day when they chose Whom they will serve and put Him on, with boldness and conviction, to serve Him with all their hearts, all their minds and all their strength!
Wednesday, March 3, 2010
What a Sight!
"She makes coverings for herself; her clothing is fine linen and purple" Proverbs 31:22 NASB
My grandmother said to me once, "you know, none of my husbands (yes, I know the implication here, but go with it for a minute) ever saw me without my hair curled and my make up fresh". She said this to me after a long day of work (she used to watch my kids for me when I worked outside the house) when I rushed in the house to get out of my suit, wash my face, put on sweats, a dirty tee-shirt and my hair up into a ponytail. I was "made up" all day long and all I wanted to do was be comfortable when I went into the kitchen to cook and clean. I thought she was crazy and even said, "My husband doesn't even like make-up". And didn't think anything of it.
About a year later, while pregnant with Cadel, I decided to put on a dress one evening before Juan got home from work. I curled my hair and put on make up. My husband isn't one of those husbands who doesn't notice small stuff - good and bad - but Juan always notices when something is "different". He walked in the door that night and immediately said, "Wow! You look nice!" And then, ready? He said, "Where are you going?" It was such a rarity to see me "nice" (not in sweats with my hair in a ponytail) that he thought for sure I had plans. I said, "No where!" and he thanked me for taking the time to look nice!
This year my church did a 40 Day Love Dare and one of the dares was to put on something nice, curl (or straighten) my hair and put make up on before my husband got home from work...so, since it was a "dare" sent out to the entire church, I had comfort knowing that I was not alone in looking like I am ready for the gym or to go to bed most of the day, but it did convict me. It convicted me that I don't take care of myself. Even after my thoughtful and astute husband "thanked" me for looking nice one night, I let an entire year go by without even thinking about making an effort to appear put together, and then, only because I was "dared" to do it by the leadership of my church. But why do I do this? Or why don't I take the time to put on nice things? To do my hair or put on make up? Is it because I am just too busy with homeschooling and being a mom of four? I don't know...what does Proverbs 31 have to say about this as a priority in my life?
The Proverbs 31 Woman is busy to be sure. She is a godly mother and a diligent wife. She is a manager of her home and her "servants". She is an entrepreneur and an enterpriser. She is creative and resourceful, but look! Do you see what else she is in verse 22? She is elegant. She is thoughtful about the aesthetics of her bedroom and about the quality of her own attire. After working all day, at the spindle, with her maidservants and out in the city selling to the merchants (oh yeah, and after she walked for miles and miles to make sure she found the best price and best quality food for her family), she is clothed in fine linen. Silk! Silk is how it is translated in some versions. And, it is purple. Purple is always a sign of elegance or royalty, but really, that is because of the time and care that went into making a garment that color. It took very careful and precise measuring and timing to get the proper shade.
Are you kidding me? She isn't covered up to her elbows in dirt and a haggard mess? Not only is she not dirty, but she is set apart. She is elegant and lovely outwardly and inwardly. 1 Peter 3:3 says, "Do not be 'merely' concerned with your outward appearance". I have always read this and given myself permission to be less than put together, but look at the verse! It says, "merely". It doesn't say not to be concerned at all. Of course we are to be concerned with our inward person and the condition of our hearts, but we can (and probably should) be concerned with the outward too!
So, to those of you who always look good - comment below and tell me how you do it :-). But to anyone who is even half as bad as me (I made a family schedule finally, this week, after two years of being home with my kids so that I make sure to get a shower every day), let's challenge ourselves to take care of us too! Just like the loaves and the fishes, we certainly need the Lord to multiply our time that even now doesn't seem enough to complete all of the tasks of our day, but we need to fit that time in there each day. Maybe it is 5 minutes before your husband gets home from work, maybe it is first thing in the morning and a refresher before he comes home, but we should do it. We don't have to look like June Cleaver, with pearls and a polka-dot dress (although, that does seem strangely fun), but take the sweats off and put on some nice jeans; take off that tee-shirt you wore to the gym this morning and put on a cute sun-dress and pull that ponytail out and throw a couple curlers in your hair while you finish up dinner or straighten the living room. A little powder and some lip gloss and we might just feel like a human being again! Try it with me...I'll start tomorrow (ha)!
My grandmother said to me once, "you know, none of my husbands (yes, I know the implication here, but go with it for a minute) ever saw me without my hair curled and my make up fresh". She said this to me after a long day of work (she used to watch my kids for me when I worked outside the house) when I rushed in the house to get out of my suit, wash my face, put on sweats, a dirty tee-shirt and my hair up into a ponytail. I was "made up" all day long and all I wanted to do was be comfortable when I went into the kitchen to cook and clean. I thought she was crazy and even said, "My husband doesn't even like make-up". And didn't think anything of it.
About a year later, while pregnant with Cadel, I decided to put on a dress one evening before Juan got home from work. I curled my hair and put on make up. My husband isn't one of those husbands who doesn't notice small stuff - good and bad - but Juan always notices when something is "different". He walked in the door that night and immediately said, "Wow! You look nice!" And then, ready? He said, "Where are you going?" It was such a rarity to see me "nice" (not in sweats with my hair in a ponytail) that he thought for sure I had plans. I said, "No where!" and he thanked me for taking the time to look nice!
This year my church did a 40 Day Love Dare and one of the dares was to put on something nice, curl (or straighten) my hair and put make up on before my husband got home from work...so, since it was a "dare" sent out to the entire church, I had comfort knowing that I was not alone in looking like I am ready for the gym or to go to bed most of the day, but it did convict me. It convicted me that I don't take care of myself. Even after my thoughtful and astute husband "thanked" me for looking nice one night, I let an entire year go by without even thinking about making an effort to appear put together, and then, only because I was "dared" to do it by the leadership of my church. But why do I do this? Or why don't I take the time to put on nice things? To do my hair or put on make up? Is it because I am just too busy with homeschooling and being a mom of four? I don't know...what does Proverbs 31 have to say about this as a priority in my life?
The Proverbs 31 Woman is busy to be sure. She is a godly mother and a diligent wife. She is a manager of her home and her "servants". She is an entrepreneur and an enterpriser. She is creative and resourceful, but look! Do you see what else she is in verse 22? She is elegant. She is thoughtful about the aesthetics of her bedroom and about the quality of her own attire. After working all day, at the spindle, with her maidservants and out in the city selling to the merchants (oh yeah, and after she walked for miles and miles to make sure she found the best price and best quality food for her family), she is clothed in fine linen. Silk! Silk is how it is translated in some versions. And, it is purple. Purple is always a sign of elegance or royalty, but really, that is because of the time and care that went into making a garment that color. It took very careful and precise measuring and timing to get the proper shade.
Are you kidding me? She isn't covered up to her elbows in dirt and a haggard mess? Not only is she not dirty, but she is set apart. She is elegant and lovely outwardly and inwardly. 1 Peter 3:3 says, "Do not be 'merely' concerned with your outward appearance". I have always read this and given myself permission to be less than put together, but look at the verse! It says, "merely". It doesn't say not to be concerned at all. Of course we are to be concerned with our inward person and the condition of our hearts, but we can (and probably should) be concerned with the outward too!
So, to those of you who always look good - comment below and tell me how you do it :-). But to anyone who is even half as bad as me (I made a family schedule finally, this week, after two years of being home with my kids so that I make sure to get a shower every day), let's challenge ourselves to take care of us too! Just like the loaves and the fishes, we certainly need the Lord to multiply our time that even now doesn't seem enough to complete all of the tasks of our day, but we need to fit that time in there each day. Maybe it is 5 minutes before your husband gets home from work, maybe it is first thing in the morning and a refresher before he comes home, but we should do it. We don't have to look like June Cleaver, with pearls and a polka-dot dress (although, that does seem strangely fun), but take the sweats off and put on some nice jeans; take off that tee-shirt you wore to the gym this morning and put on a cute sun-dress and pull that ponytail out and throw a couple curlers in your hair while you finish up dinner or straighten the living room. A little powder and some lip gloss and we might just feel like a human being again! Try it with me...I'll start tomorrow (ha)!
Friday, February 19, 2010
Teach Them!
"She opens her mouth in wisdom, and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue" Proverbs 31:26 NASB
Teaching has inevitably been on my mind in recent days due to the "call" and privilege I have been given by the Lord to home school our ten-year old daughter. This journey to home school began while I was exploring options for Naomi, our four-year old, for Kindergarten, and, when it became abundantly clear that going to public school would be a grave disservice to her, and the private school we have her in for preschool has received less-than-glowing reviews in the Kindergarten class, I reverted back to a thought I had months ago, "perhaps I am supposed to home school her". This same evening while praying before bed, the Lord impressed upon my heart Romans 11 (especially verse 17), "you, though a wild olive shoot, have been grafted in among the others and now share in the nourishing sap from the olive root" and how this applies to my step-daughter.
The God of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob, the God of Israel, has grafted me, a sinner and a Gentile, into the Olive Tree, into His eternal plan, and He has permitted me to "share in the nourishing sap" of that tree that was intended for His Chosen Nation, Israel. I have NEVER grafted Gitzel into our family tree. She has always been an after-thought, a side-issue and someone who I looked forward to making travel arrangements for every three months (Easter, Christmas and Summer break - Baby!). The Lord was calling (and convicting, be sure of it) me to graft her in and do for her what I would (and planned on doing) do for my own children - bring her home and teach her!
Because of her academic, behavioral and social problems, of course, my initial goal was to bring her home to teach her the fundamentals of academics, with some scripture and biblical principals sprinkled in here and there. This "experiment" to me was to endeavor to "catch her up" to grade level standards, but God's intention was to give her, "a future and a hope" because the call on our lives to "train up a child in the way he should go" (Proverbs 22:6a), is not about reading, writing and math, but lessons of life, faith, love and so much more. We are called to teach them the fear of the Lord (psalm 34:11). We are called to make biblical principals a part of every day life and to teach them the gospel and story of our Lord Jesus Christ so that they first will receive it into their own hearts and profess faith in Him, and then, so that they will preach it in their families, schools (where applicable), teams, groups and anywhere else we send them. Now, I realize that we are not all "called" to home school our children, in the traditional sense, but we are all, as mothers, called to teach our children, and fill in the gaps where the world, public or private, fails and flounders. It is our job to give them a firm foundation, to give them the tools necessary that they may find their feet planted firmly upon the Rock of Jesus Christ, so that when floods and storms come into their lives, they do not waiver, they do not flail, but "when they are old, they do not depart" (Proverbs 22:6b).
So, when this "mother" in verse 26 of Proverbs 31, opens her mouth in wisdom, chokmah in Hebrew, she opens her mouth with godly wisdom. This is not wisdom that the world gives. This word is used to describe the kind of wisdom Solomon received when he asked the Lord for wisdom. It is ascribed to men and women like: Aaron, upon entering the promise land; Hannah, as she implored the Lord for her son; Job, Isaiah and Daniel at various times in theirs lives. It means, wisdom (in administration), shrewdness and prudence in faith. How can the world ever teach this to our dear children? They cannot, it is our job! And it is our job to do it in kindness, gentleness and faithfulness (Proverbs 31:26b).
So back to my specific call. Gitzel has annoyed and irritated just about every adult she has spent more than 1 day with. It isn't' mean, it is true. She is a sweet, gentle, forgiving and resilient girl who is over-bearing, over-eager and full of less-than-necessary comments and "questions" that rub just about everyone the wrong way. This is, primarily, why everyone thought I was "crazy" to bring her home and attach her to my hip! But God, in His wisdom, reminded me of the great and wonderful qualities she possesses. As I already said, she is sweet, forgiving and resilient. She sulks and shuts-down when she is harshly disciplined, how much more does the "law of kindness on [my] tongue" need to be evident every day, in every lesson? How much more will, "pleasant words [be as] a honeycomb, sweet to [her] soul, and health to [her] bones" (Proverbs 16:24), than ever perhaps my own children who are less emotional and sensitive?
So, we teach! We teach the fear of the Lord. We teach wisdom, discretion, self-control and all the fruits of the Spirit (Galatians 5:22). We teach manners and life-skills and we either supplement what our children learn in school to ensure that they are well-rounded young men and women, or we teach them utterly and completely if God has called us to that, but we must teach them! It is our call, and it is our call to do it in kindness. The Word of God promises that, "the wise in heart will be called prudent and sweetness of the lips increases learning" (Proverbs 16:20). If He has called you to be a mother, He has called you to be a teacher, and if He has called you to be a teacher, He will equip you to do it! Pray and ask Him to show you how if you don't already have a clear vision. A year ago I saw none of this on my horizon, and I certainly didn't faithfully apply these verses to my mothering check lists (especially not for Gitzel), but God is faithful, and He will do it!
Teaching has inevitably been on my mind in recent days due to the "call" and privilege I have been given by the Lord to home school our ten-year old daughter. This journey to home school began while I was exploring options for Naomi, our four-year old, for Kindergarten, and, when it became abundantly clear that going to public school would be a grave disservice to her, and the private school we have her in for preschool has received less-than-glowing reviews in the Kindergarten class, I reverted back to a thought I had months ago, "perhaps I am supposed to home school her". This same evening while praying before bed, the Lord impressed upon my heart Romans 11 (especially verse 17), "you, though a wild olive shoot, have been grafted in among the others and now share in the nourishing sap from the olive root" and how this applies to my step-daughter.
The God of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob, the God of Israel, has grafted me, a sinner and a Gentile, into the Olive Tree, into His eternal plan, and He has permitted me to "share in the nourishing sap" of that tree that was intended for His Chosen Nation, Israel. I have NEVER grafted Gitzel into our family tree. She has always been an after-thought, a side-issue and someone who I looked forward to making travel arrangements for every three months (Easter, Christmas and Summer break - Baby!). The Lord was calling (and convicting, be sure of it) me to graft her in and do for her what I would (and planned on doing) do for my own children - bring her home and teach her!
Because of her academic, behavioral and social problems, of course, my initial goal was to bring her home to teach her the fundamentals of academics, with some scripture and biblical principals sprinkled in here and there. This "experiment" to me was to endeavor to "catch her up" to grade level standards, but God's intention was to give her, "a future and a hope" because the call on our lives to "train up a child in the way he should go" (Proverbs 22:6a), is not about reading, writing and math, but lessons of life, faith, love and so much more. We are called to teach them the fear of the Lord (psalm 34:11). We are called to make biblical principals a part of every day life and to teach them the gospel and story of our Lord Jesus Christ so that they first will receive it into their own hearts and profess faith in Him, and then, so that they will preach it in their families, schools (where applicable), teams, groups and anywhere else we send them. Now, I realize that we are not all "called" to home school our children, in the traditional sense, but we are all, as mothers, called to teach our children, and fill in the gaps where the world, public or private, fails and flounders. It is our job to give them a firm foundation, to give them the tools necessary that they may find their feet planted firmly upon the Rock of Jesus Christ, so that when floods and storms come into their lives, they do not waiver, they do not flail, but "when they are old, they do not depart" (Proverbs 22:6b).
So, when this "mother" in verse 26 of Proverbs 31, opens her mouth in wisdom, chokmah in Hebrew, she opens her mouth with godly wisdom. This is not wisdom that the world gives. This word is used to describe the kind of wisdom Solomon received when he asked the Lord for wisdom. It is ascribed to men and women like: Aaron, upon entering the promise land; Hannah, as she implored the Lord for her son; Job, Isaiah and Daniel at various times in theirs lives. It means, wisdom (in administration), shrewdness and prudence in faith. How can the world ever teach this to our dear children? They cannot, it is our job! And it is our job to do it in kindness, gentleness and faithfulness (Proverbs 31:26b).
So back to my specific call. Gitzel has annoyed and irritated just about every adult she has spent more than 1 day with. It isn't' mean, it is true. She is a sweet, gentle, forgiving and resilient girl who is over-bearing, over-eager and full of less-than-necessary comments and "questions" that rub just about everyone the wrong way. This is, primarily, why everyone thought I was "crazy" to bring her home and attach her to my hip! But God, in His wisdom, reminded me of the great and wonderful qualities she possesses. As I already said, she is sweet, forgiving and resilient. She sulks and shuts-down when she is harshly disciplined, how much more does the "law of kindness on [my] tongue" need to be evident every day, in every lesson? How much more will, "pleasant words [be as] a honeycomb, sweet to [her] soul, and health to [her] bones" (Proverbs 16:24), than ever perhaps my own children who are less emotional and sensitive?
So, we teach! We teach the fear of the Lord. We teach wisdom, discretion, self-control and all the fruits of the Spirit (Galatians 5:22). We teach manners and life-skills and we either supplement what our children learn in school to ensure that they are well-rounded young men and women, or we teach them utterly and completely if God has called us to that, but we must teach them! It is our call, and it is our call to do it in kindness. The Word of God promises that, "the wise in heart will be called prudent and sweetness of the lips increases learning" (Proverbs 16:20). If He has called you to be a mother, He has called you to be a teacher, and if He has called you to be a teacher, He will equip you to do it! Pray and ask Him to show you how if you don't already have a clear vision. A year ago I saw none of this on my horizon, and I certainly didn't faithfully apply these verses to my mothering check lists (especially not for Gitzel), but God is faithful, and He will do it!
Tuesday, February 9, 2010
Is she for real?
“An Excellent Wife, who can find? For her worth is far above jewels” NASB
I may be a little obsessed, right now, with this passage and all others related to it, but I can think of worse things to be a little consumed by! So, in my research about being a godly, virtuous, strong, excellent, able-minded (this is how the word is translated in the original language) wife, I have found a common theme: all the male commentators make sure that the men to whom they are writing seek hard after this type of woman, praying and imploring the Lord while encouraging women to seek hard after the Lord to be transformed into this woman; however, many female commentators make mention that this “woman” does not really exist! She is an ideal, but certainly not a "real" woman! Phooey…I am sorry, but I think that is a cop-out!
Christ is our example as we press toward the goal, is He not? We will never be “perfect” until we meet our Lord face to face, but does that mean that we should not wake each day aspiring to put off the old man and put on the new man, created in true righteousness? Should we accept that in this body we will never be like Him and not long for the fruits of His Spirit – love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness and faithfulness – to be words that others use to describe us? If our answers to these questions are, “yes”, then why should we rest on the idea that the “woman” in Proverbs 31 may (or may not) really be an actual woman, or that she is just an ideal to aspire to? If our “men” are to seek after us like a rare and precious jewel, should we not desire to be that rare and precious jewel that they seek?
So, like any other discipline in life, you have to look at it in small parts. If a person has 100 pounds to lose, she will be overwhelmed if she thinks of the entire 100 pounds coming off and how that could be possible, but if she looks at in, say, 10 pounds at a time, that, all of a sudden, is do-able! The same goes with our walk with the Lord – while we are to make a full turn from our old life and turn to Christ, forsaking sin and all manner of the flesh, God is gentle and kind and shows us the areas in our lives that He has not been made Lord over, and lovingly and gently shows us how to surrender those areas. So, let us see our call to be an excellent wife in just the same way. Give glory to God when you realize how you have experienced victory in one or two of the verses and pray, fast, implore and wait on God to show you how you can be more like “her” in the other verses.
How can you be more trustworthy (v.11); more organized (v.11)? Is your house in order? Do you need to manage things at home more sensibly (Titus 2:5)? How can you work on kindness towards your husband and build him up around others (v.12)? Do you need to submit under him in more ways, or at all? Do you respect your husband (Ephesians 5:33)? Do you do what you need to do around your home with a joyful heart, or do you find yourself complaining about how much there is to be done and how little help you have (v.13)? Are you thoughtful about your purchases and do you take good care of your family (v.14)? How is your schedule? Are you hit and miss one day after another, or do you have a schedule and keep it for the most part? Are you organized with your housework and the needs of those in your house (v.15)? Are you prudent with money (v.16) and a good steward of it when you have it (v.18)? How is your energy? Are you able to complete the tasks that are before you each day (vv. 17 & 19)? Are you diligent and concerned with the small details of your family? Do your children and your husband leave the house each day looking like someone cares for them, or are they disheveled and unkempt (v. 21)? What about you? How do you look? Do you take care of yourself, or have all the duties of home, husband and kids have you taking the backseat to your own well-being over and over again (v.22)? Are you industrious (v.24), generous and compassionate (v.20), poised as a teacher (v.25) and wise (v.26)?
Am I? Absolutely not (yet)! Do I want to be? Yes! I want my children to rise up and call me blessed, my husband also and praise [me]! Don’t you? But lest we grow weary in doing good, keep in mind, verse 25 says that she will “rejoice in times to come”. This woman reaps much of the benefits of her hard work and dedication to her husband, family and home later! But yet she still does it, willingly and joyfully because “her own works [will] praise her in the gates” (v.31). We are the crown of our husbands (Proverbs 12:4) and a gift from God (Proverbs 19:14)! So let us all wake each morning wondering how to have someone say to us, “Many daughters have done well, but you excel them all” (v.29) because, we are daughters of the King, and He equips and encourages us to do all that He calls us to do! Without Him we can do nothing, but we can do all things through Christ who strenghtens us (Phil 4:13)
I may be a little obsessed, right now, with this passage and all others related to it, but I can think of worse things to be a little consumed by! So, in my research about being a godly, virtuous, strong, excellent, able-minded (this is how the word is translated in the original language) wife, I have found a common theme: all the male commentators make sure that the men to whom they are writing seek hard after this type of woman, praying and imploring the Lord while encouraging women to seek hard after the Lord to be transformed into this woman; however, many female commentators make mention that this “woman” does not really exist! She is an ideal, but certainly not a "real" woman! Phooey…I am sorry, but I think that is a cop-out!
Christ is our example as we press toward the goal, is He not? We will never be “perfect” until we meet our Lord face to face, but does that mean that we should not wake each day aspiring to put off the old man and put on the new man, created in true righteousness? Should we accept that in this body we will never be like Him and not long for the fruits of His Spirit – love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness and faithfulness – to be words that others use to describe us? If our answers to these questions are, “yes”, then why should we rest on the idea that the “woman” in Proverbs 31 may (or may not) really be an actual woman, or that she is just an ideal to aspire to? If our “men” are to seek after us like a rare and precious jewel, should we not desire to be that rare and precious jewel that they seek?
So, like any other discipline in life, you have to look at it in small parts. If a person has 100 pounds to lose, she will be overwhelmed if she thinks of the entire 100 pounds coming off and how that could be possible, but if she looks at in, say, 10 pounds at a time, that, all of a sudden, is do-able! The same goes with our walk with the Lord – while we are to make a full turn from our old life and turn to Christ, forsaking sin and all manner of the flesh, God is gentle and kind and shows us the areas in our lives that He has not been made Lord over, and lovingly and gently shows us how to surrender those areas. So, let us see our call to be an excellent wife in just the same way. Give glory to God when you realize how you have experienced victory in one or two of the verses and pray, fast, implore and wait on God to show you how you can be more like “her” in the other verses.
How can you be more trustworthy (v.11); more organized (v.11)? Is your house in order? Do you need to manage things at home more sensibly (Titus 2:5)? How can you work on kindness towards your husband and build him up around others (v.12)? Do you need to submit under him in more ways, or at all? Do you respect your husband (Ephesians 5:33)? Do you do what you need to do around your home with a joyful heart, or do you find yourself complaining about how much there is to be done and how little help you have (v.13)? Are you thoughtful about your purchases and do you take good care of your family (v.14)? How is your schedule? Are you hit and miss one day after another, or do you have a schedule and keep it for the most part? Are you organized with your housework and the needs of those in your house (v.15)? Are you prudent with money (v.16) and a good steward of it when you have it (v.18)? How is your energy? Are you able to complete the tasks that are before you each day (vv. 17 & 19)? Are you diligent and concerned with the small details of your family? Do your children and your husband leave the house each day looking like someone cares for them, or are they disheveled and unkempt (v. 21)? What about you? How do you look? Do you take care of yourself, or have all the duties of home, husband and kids have you taking the backseat to your own well-being over and over again (v.22)? Are you industrious (v.24), generous and compassionate (v.20), poised as a teacher (v.25) and wise (v.26)?
Am I? Absolutely not (yet)! Do I want to be? Yes! I want my children to rise up and call me blessed, my husband also and praise [me]! Don’t you? But lest we grow weary in doing good, keep in mind, verse 25 says that she will “rejoice in times to come”. This woman reaps much of the benefits of her hard work and dedication to her husband, family and home later! But yet she still does it, willingly and joyfully because “her own works [will] praise her in the gates” (v.31). We are the crown of our husbands (Proverbs 12:4) and a gift from God (Proverbs 19:14)! So let us all wake each morning wondering how to have someone say to us, “Many daughters have done well, but you excel them all” (v.29) because, we are daughters of the King, and He equips and encourages us to do all that He calls us to do! Without Him we can do nothing, but we can do all things through Christ who strenghtens us (Phil 4:13)
Sunday, February 7, 2010
His Heart Safely Trusts Me!
"The heart of her husband safely trusts her. He will have no lack of gain" (v. 11)
The amplified bible says, "The heart of her husband trusts in her confidently and relies on and believes in her securely, so that he has no lack of [honest] gain or need of [dishonest] spoil". This verse, along with verses like 1 Tim 5:14 and Titus 2:5, tell me that it is biblical for the woman, the wife, to take care of the affairs of the household (including, but not limited to, finances). It may not be every household, and I am not saying that everyone has to do it that way, but it appears to be biblical, and it is how we have always done it in our marriage. The man in this passage can go to work, he can leave town (if necessary) to go on a business trip or do what he is called to do outside the house, knowing with confidence that his wife will not waste or spend frivolously the money that he has sacrificed time with his family to earn and worked so hard to bring home. His wife has integrity, wisdom and discretion in domestic matters and he has no need to question the decisions she makes.
So, as a means of encouragement, I am sure, the Lord showed me just yesterday that, while I may be a far cry from the "excellent wife" in the majority of the other verses, in this way, God has blessed our marriage and caused my husband's heart to trust me. I do not begin to believe that we have "arrived", but by his actions and more importantly his "in-action", it is clear that he knows, with confidence, that the decisions I make (less, perhaps a couple gratuitous Starbucks purchases), are for the good of our family and our home. By way of example:
In October of 2008, I was put on disability from my job for my third pregnancy. Our income dropped slightly (by 33%), but we adjusted and learned to live within our means. After our baby was born in March 2009, and our disability ran out, my job laid me off (due to the economy) and our income was reduced again by my going on unemployment - again, an adjustment was made, and this time a bit more drastic. I could see in the eyes of my husband that he was depressed. I could see that he felt like he was not providing for our family, but he was, and he is and he always has. By the grace of my loving Heavenly Father, who always provides for those who trust in Him (psalm 34:8-10), we never went without! I half-heartily looked for work, but really, I felt the Lord calling me to be home with our children. I didn't know how to tell him (as I shared in my first post, my husband does not "walk" with the Lord, so it is hard to know what I can share that "the Lord is leading me to do", and what I cannot), but I just continued to pray and asked the Lord to either change my heart (to go back to work), or confirm to me that home is where I was supposed to be!
After a couple weeks of seeking the Lord in ways that I haven't done in years, it was so clear, without hesitation, that home is where the Lord desires me to be. It is His design for the family, and the only reason that I could see for me to go back to work was financial, and He has already promised that there is no want to those who fear Him. If I put Him, and His kingdom first, all these other things will be added unto [us]. He clothes the flowers and feeds the birds, my family will not go without. I didn't share this with my husband yet. I continued to pray, then, it hit me. The Lord was calling me to do something that I never thought I would be able to do: He was calling me to home school my ten year old step-daughter. Really? Yes!
My relationship with my step-daughter is enough for a whole other post, but if you know any blended family, you can imagine the struggles that we share (and then multiply them by 100), and God is calling me to spend every waking hour with her! Strangely, I was not afraid or hesitant. All I could think was, "what better way to learn to love her than to have to pour love and patience into her each day?" and "how blessed with my husband be when he sees God's love, through me, going to his daughter, and ultimately, peace in our home?". Okay Lord, here we go! But wait, this means that I absolutely cannot go back to work. If I commit to this, and pull Gitzel out of school to home school her in the hopes that we can catch her up academically and ensure that she learns all she needs to learn, I cannot go back to work! When my unemployment benefits run out, that is it! Another means of income will need to be provided. Now it was time to share this news with my husband.
He did not bat an eye. He was only concerned about me and if it would be too much for me to be with her every day. He wanted to make sure that we made a scheduled that fit around my needs (for the gym, quiet time, etc.). He never questioned how we would afford our bills, or "what next" (he didn't even question the wisdom behind pulling his daughter out of school to give her a home/Christian education). The heart of my husband safely trusts me, and because of this, he will have no lack of gain! What a testament to the grace, love and work of God in the midst of my marriage and how He will move in the lives of His children when they put their trust in Him.
"Oh, taste and see that the LORD is good;
Blessed is the man who trusts in Him!
Oh, fear the LORD, you His saints!
There is no want to those who fear Him.
The young lions lack and suffer hunger;
But those who seek the LORD shall not lack any good thing."
(Psalm 34:8-10)
The amplified bible says, "The heart of her husband trusts in her confidently and relies on and believes in her securely, so that he has no lack of [honest] gain or need of [dishonest] spoil". This verse, along with verses like 1 Tim 5:14 and Titus 2:5, tell me that it is biblical for the woman, the wife, to take care of the affairs of the household (including, but not limited to, finances). It may not be every household, and I am not saying that everyone has to do it that way, but it appears to be biblical, and it is how we have always done it in our marriage. The man in this passage can go to work, he can leave town (if necessary) to go on a business trip or do what he is called to do outside the house, knowing with confidence that his wife will not waste or spend frivolously the money that he has sacrificed time with his family to earn and worked so hard to bring home. His wife has integrity, wisdom and discretion in domestic matters and he has no need to question the decisions she makes.
So, as a means of encouragement, I am sure, the Lord showed me just yesterday that, while I may be a far cry from the "excellent wife" in the majority of the other verses, in this way, God has blessed our marriage and caused my husband's heart to trust me. I do not begin to believe that we have "arrived", but by his actions and more importantly his "in-action", it is clear that he knows, with confidence, that the decisions I make (less, perhaps a couple gratuitous Starbucks purchases), are for the good of our family and our home. By way of example:
In October of 2008, I was put on disability from my job for my third pregnancy. Our income dropped slightly (by 33%), but we adjusted and learned to live within our means. After our baby was born in March 2009, and our disability ran out, my job laid me off (due to the economy) and our income was reduced again by my going on unemployment - again, an adjustment was made, and this time a bit more drastic. I could see in the eyes of my husband that he was depressed. I could see that he felt like he was not providing for our family, but he was, and he is and he always has. By the grace of my loving Heavenly Father, who always provides for those who trust in Him (psalm 34:8-10), we never went without! I half-heartily looked for work, but really, I felt the Lord calling me to be home with our children. I didn't know how to tell him (as I shared in my first post, my husband does not "walk" with the Lord, so it is hard to know what I can share that "the Lord is leading me to do", and what I cannot), but I just continued to pray and asked the Lord to either change my heart (to go back to work), or confirm to me that home is where I was supposed to be!
After a couple weeks of seeking the Lord in ways that I haven't done in years, it was so clear, without hesitation, that home is where the Lord desires me to be. It is His design for the family, and the only reason that I could see for me to go back to work was financial, and He has already promised that there is no want to those who fear Him. If I put Him, and His kingdom first, all these other things will be added unto [us]. He clothes the flowers and feeds the birds, my family will not go without. I didn't share this with my husband yet. I continued to pray, then, it hit me. The Lord was calling me to do something that I never thought I would be able to do: He was calling me to home school my ten year old step-daughter. Really? Yes!
My relationship with my step-daughter is enough for a whole other post, but if you know any blended family, you can imagine the struggles that we share (and then multiply them by 100), and God is calling me to spend every waking hour with her! Strangely, I was not afraid or hesitant. All I could think was, "what better way to learn to love her than to have to pour love and patience into her each day?" and "how blessed with my husband be when he sees God's love, through me, going to his daughter, and ultimately, peace in our home?". Okay Lord, here we go! But wait, this means that I absolutely cannot go back to work. If I commit to this, and pull Gitzel out of school to home school her in the hopes that we can catch her up academically and ensure that she learns all she needs to learn, I cannot go back to work! When my unemployment benefits run out, that is it! Another means of income will need to be provided. Now it was time to share this news with my husband.
He did not bat an eye. He was only concerned about me and if it would be too much for me to be with her every day. He wanted to make sure that we made a scheduled that fit around my needs (for the gym, quiet time, etc.). He never questioned how we would afford our bills, or "what next" (he didn't even question the wisdom behind pulling his daughter out of school to give her a home/Christian education). The heart of my husband safely trusts me, and because of this, he will have no lack of gain! What a testament to the grace, love and work of God in the midst of my marriage and how He will move in the lives of His children when they put their trust in Him.
"Oh, taste and see that the LORD is good;
Blessed is the man who trusts in Him!
Oh, fear the LORD, you His saints!
There is no want to those who fear Him.
The young lions lack and suffer hunger;
But those who seek the LORD shall not lack any good thing."
(Psalm 34:8-10)
Saturday, February 6, 2010
Why am I here?
As way of introduction for my first entry into this blog, I am first and foremost, a follower of Jesus Christ and always and ever endeavoring to be all that He desires me to be. Secondly, I am a wife. Next, I am a mother and a step-mother. These three roles truly make-up my joys, my sorrows, my struggles and my triumphs.
As a Christian, I have been on fire, spurred on by good works, meditating in His word day and night, filled with His joy and praying without ceasing; but I have also turned away from God, lived for my own carnal desires, been lukewarm (at best) and in grave danger of being "spat out of" His mouth. On the mountain-top of my faith, I learned to hide His word in my heart as a student of Chemistry memorizes the Periodic Chart; I studied Greek to have better knowledge of what words like propitiation, sacrifice, redemption and justification meant and I got a very good "handle" of things that Christian's are "supposed" to do: read my bible every day, memorize verses, write in my journal, fast, pray, tithe, serve, etc. But, not until I was tired of running the race and sick of "doing" my faith, not until I decided to hang my crowns for Christ on the bookshelf next to my bible(s) and journals and follow hard after the desires of my flesh, did I really begin to understand what it meant that, while I was still a sinner, Christ died for me! He didn't love me more when I was being "religious" or dutifully serving in a church somewhere. Was I more effective for Him and His kingdom in those times when I was praying and reading and fellowshipping with fellow believers? Perhaps! But did He love me more? Absolutely not!
What a better way to see God's love for the world, the sinners and the saints, then to basque in it when I was abundantly aware that I did not deserve it.
It was during this time of wallowing in the miry clay, before I turned back to Him and allowed Him once again to set my feet upon the ROCK, that I met, fell in love with, conceived a child with (yes, in that order) and married my husband. We are unequally yoked! My husband knows God, to what extent, I do not know, nor is it for me to judge - but I pray for His salvation every day. I long to have a partner raising our children in the way that they should go so that when they are old, they will not depart from it. My husband is kind and thoughtful. He is a great listener and a wonderful counselor and provider. Our family has never been "without" , but only because we are covered by the blessings that God bestows upon me. Oh how much more do I long for my husband to be our covering! He "allows" me to participate in the disciplines of Christianity that I know to be essential to a strong and fruitful walk with the Lord. He has watched me move from lukewarm to on-fire and has given me space to do so personally and publicly: with my time, with our finances and with our children. Despite a drastic change in our income, he has never once batted an eye at my desire to stay home with our four children (I worked until my last pregnancy and was forced home, but more on that later), and never ever hung anything over my head that doesn't make "sense" to less faithfully minded person.
So, as I daily seek God's will for my life and where and how to better serve the Lord, my husband and my children, through prayers and fastings, God has lead me to such an obvious place, a place in my bible underlined, highlighted and committed to memory; a place, however, that I always saw as an unattainable ideal and certainly not, until this week, a formula for God's design for me as an excellent wife, a successful homemaker, a wise teacher, a generous saint and a well-rounded woman of God - Proverbs 31:10-31
Who can find a virtuous wife?
For her worth is far above rubies.
The heart of her husband safely trusts her;
So he will have no lack of gain.
She does him good and not evil
All the days of her life.
She seeks wool and flax,
And willingly works with her hands.
She is like the merchant ships,
She brings her food from afar.
She also rises while it is yet night,
And provides food for her household,
And a portion for her maidservants.
She considers a field and buys it;
From her profits she plants a vineyard.
She girds herself with strength,
And strengthens her arms.
She perceives that her merchandise is good,
And her lamp does not go out by night.
She stretches out her hand to the distaff,
And her hand holds the spindle.
She extends her hand to the poor,
Yes, she reaches out her hands to the needy.
She is not afraid of snow for her household,
For all her household is clothed with scarlet.
She makes tapestry for herself;
Her clothing is fine linen and purple.
Her husband is known in the gates,
When he sits among the elders of the land.
She makes linen garments and sells them.
And supplies sashes for the merchants.
Strength and honor are her clothing;
She shall rejoice in time to come.
She opens her mouth with wisdom,
And on her tongue is the law of kindness.
She watches over the ways of her household,
And does not eat the bread of idleness.
Her children rise up and call her blessed;
Her husband also, and he praises her:
Many daughters have done well,
But you exceed them all.
Charm is deceitful and beauty is passing,
But a woman who fears the Lord, she shall be praised.
Give her of the fruit of her hands,
And let her own works praise her in the gates
As a Christian, I have been on fire, spurred on by good works, meditating in His word day and night, filled with His joy and praying without ceasing; but I have also turned away from God, lived for my own carnal desires, been lukewarm (at best) and in grave danger of being "spat out of" His mouth. On the mountain-top of my faith, I learned to hide His word in my heart as a student of Chemistry memorizes the Periodic Chart; I studied Greek to have better knowledge of what words like propitiation, sacrifice, redemption and justification meant and I got a very good "handle" of things that Christian's are "supposed" to do: read my bible every day, memorize verses, write in my journal, fast, pray, tithe, serve, etc. But, not until I was tired of running the race and sick of "doing" my faith, not until I decided to hang my crowns for Christ on the bookshelf next to my bible(s) and journals and follow hard after the desires of my flesh, did I really begin to understand what it meant that, while I was still a sinner, Christ died for me! He didn't love me more when I was being "religious" or dutifully serving in a church somewhere. Was I more effective for Him and His kingdom in those times when I was praying and reading and fellowshipping with fellow believers? Perhaps! But did He love me more? Absolutely not!
What a better way to see God's love for the world, the sinners and the saints, then to basque in it when I was abundantly aware that I did not deserve it.
It was during this time of wallowing in the miry clay, before I turned back to Him and allowed Him once again to set my feet upon the ROCK, that I met, fell in love with, conceived a child with (yes, in that order) and married my husband. We are unequally yoked! My husband knows God, to what extent, I do not know, nor is it for me to judge - but I pray for His salvation every day. I long to have a partner raising our children in the way that they should go so that when they are old, they will not depart from it. My husband is kind and thoughtful. He is a great listener and a wonderful counselor and provider. Our family has never been "without" , but only because we are covered by the blessings that God bestows upon me. Oh how much more do I long for my husband to be our covering! He "allows" me to participate in the disciplines of Christianity that I know to be essential to a strong and fruitful walk with the Lord. He has watched me move from lukewarm to on-fire and has given me space to do so personally and publicly: with my time, with our finances and with our children. Despite a drastic change in our income, he has never once batted an eye at my desire to stay home with our four children (I worked until my last pregnancy and was forced home, but more on that later), and never ever hung anything over my head that doesn't make "sense" to less faithfully minded person.
So, as I daily seek God's will for my life and where and how to better serve the Lord, my husband and my children, through prayers and fastings, God has lead me to such an obvious place, a place in my bible underlined, highlighted and committed to memory; a place, however, that I always saw as an unattainable ideal and certainly not, until this week, a formula for God's design for me as an excellent wife, a successful homemaker, a wise teacher, a generous saint and a well-rounded woman of God - Proverbs 31:10-31
Who can find a virtuous wife?
For her worth is far above rubies.
The heart of her husband safely trusts her;
So he will have no lack of gain.
She does him good and not evil
All the days of her life.
She seeks wool and flax,
And willingly works with her hands.
She is like the merchant ships,
She brings her food from afar.
She also rises while it is yet night,
And provides food for her household,
And a portion for her maidservants.
She considers a field and buys it;
From her profits she plants a vineyard.
She girds herself with strength,
And strengthens her arms.
She perceives that her merchandise is good,
And her lamp does not go out by night.
She stretches out her hand to the distaff,
And her hand holds the spindle.
She extends her hand to the poor,
Yes, she reaches out her hands to the needy.
She is not afraid of snow for her household,
For all her household is clothed with scarlet.
She makes tapestry for herself;
Her clothing is fine linen and purple.
Her husband is known in the gates,
When he sits among the elders of the land.
She makes linen garments and sells them.
And supplies sashes for the merchants.
Strength and honor are her clothing;
She shall rejoice in time to come.
She opens her mouth with wisdom,
And on her tongue is the law of kindness.
She watches over the ways of her household,
And does not eat the bread of idleness.
Her children rise up and call her blessed;
Her husband also, and he praises her:
Many daughters have done well,
But you exceed them all.
Charm is deceitful and beauty is passing,
But a woman who fears the Lord, she shall be praised.
Give her of the fruit of her hands,
And let her own works praise her in the gates
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